Ever since the middle of March, there has been one blow after another due to the Coronavirus pandemic that has swept our world. Starting on Tuesday, March 10th, it has just been one cancellation after the next in our lives from after-school activities to school to trips to family events. Every time something gets cancelled, it emotionally hurts my heart. After a day or two or three, I begin to accept the latest blow in our lives and pick myself up. During all of this, the hope for a return to our "normal lives" has helped to keep me going. The biggest hope I had was for our schools to reopen before the school year ended. Although Ron has been predicting that we would not go back until the Fall ever since the announcement was made that school was cancelled for six weeks, I had held on to the hope that our children would be able to return to school--even if it was just for a part of May and June. This hope has really helped to keep me going through these weeks that I have spent at home trying to home school our three older children with a baby in tow.
Yesterday, after a fun, family bike ride in the beautiful sunshine, we stopped at the grocery store on our way home so that I could run in and buy some eggs and dye to color Easter eggs later this week. I walked into the store with my face mask on with a happiness in my heart for how well our family activity had gone on the day that we were supposed to be flying to Hawaii. After returning to Ron and the kids who were waiting in the car, I learned about our governor's announcement that had just been made that all schools in our state are now closed through the end of the school year. This was such a blow. I immediately got a pit in my stomach and a headache on our ride home as I tried to process this massive cancellation in our lives.
I am so tired of this virus and everything that it has done to impact our lives. I am so sad that I now have to cancel everything that was already on my calendar for the months of May and June that I was seriously hoping that we would still be able to do. I am sad that my children do not get to finish off the school year with their friends and teachers. I am sad that Ella does not get to participate in her dance studio's big recital that she had already been preparing for and looking forward to for so many months. I am sad that our family does not get to go with Ron to his district admin retreat to the beautiful resort on Hood Canal that we missed last year because it was during the two days between school finishing and leaving for our trip to Florida (when I needed to stay home to pack and prepare for our trip). And I am most sad about Lia missing out on all of the wonderful, end-of-the-school year activities that have been planned for her sixth grade class as they leave elementary school and head off to junior high in the fall. This includes 6th Grade Camp that her class raised $6,000 for, the school's field day which was going to be epic this year as the PTA had doubled the funds for it, the 6th grade assembly, the signing of yearbooks, and the opportunity for Lia to say goodbye to all of her friends as her ENTIRE class is going to attend a junior high downtown while Lia and five other classmates go to the junior high up the hill from our house. In addition, this year was Lia's one and only year that she was able to attend the same school as two of her siblings. After this year, she will always be on her own and so it makes me sad that she is missing out on the last three months of this special year walking the same school hallways as Logan and Ella. All of this is such a disappointment and I have given myself a few days to feel sorry about all of this before it is time to just accept our new reality and move on. But until then, I am going to allow myself the chance to shed a tear or two...
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